I’ve just come up with the idea to start writing regularly; the idea is “snapshots” of my life. The mundane things, my interests etc. Hi future me. More emotional writing will be reserved for my journal. Journal makes me sound like a little girl, it’s actually a requirement for counselling courses. I’ve been rubbish with my journal, most days I could have written in it but considering I started it nearly a year ago now it’s a bit pitiful which has surprised me considering I enjoy writing.
I go to Keele University, one day a week (of course it’s the summer break right now) and I’m looking for my placement for next year; we’re required to get an unpaid job for experience and I have my first interview on the 8th August. I love what I do and I’m excited about my career. The course has changed me in some positive ways. I’m full of love and consideration.
I’ve been writing about my second labour but nearly 2 months on I haven’t completed or published it…
I’m writing in my lounge watching Mad Men, Florence is asleep on the sofa next to me, Eva is in bed, I have a coffee and it’s the evening before my Birthday. I find Mad Men wonderfully fascinating, I watched some of it several years ago and I’m now giving it another go. The second thing that comes to mind is that I love Birthday’s. As an adult I decided that they’re really special and that it’s important to celebrate people’s lives; for me, it’s not about ageing, it’s about being alive. I like to think about how precious life is. Life has the potential to be endlessly interesting. If I had more money I would make such a big effort for those that I care about because I really do like Birthday’s. I’m a Birthdayer. Of course there’s still that niggling notion of ageing and that scares me a bit, it can’t be slowed down. Days just keep rolling by so quickly. My big baby is almost 2!
Which moves me on to Eva. I want to write a little about her. She’s of the glorious age of tantruming, it can be caused by not having the coordination to put some trousers on or something being stuck (something is always stuck). Having a nappy change is terrible, nap time is terrible, getting dressed is terrible and if she can escape your grasp it’s hilarious. Little sod. Some of Eva’s favourites are: empty cups of coffee which is usually celebrated by “‘Offee, ‘offee, s’all gone!… ‘Offee” and she’ll pick up the cup and give it to me, then she’ll want to replace it on the table and she’ll tell you that it’s all gone again (she usually finds it empty, I don’t have many hot drinks when she’s around); she loves shoes, socks and bags and she really doesn’t discriminate; adults shoes, plastic bags- it’s all good; she loves to kiss things which I take the blame for- I wanted to raise a loving child…but now she kisses potatoes…; she loves those novelty rides that you put a pound into only she hates it when you put a pound in…
Things that I like: Kipling bags, Cath Kidston, vintage style floral patterns, Florence and the Machine, taking photos, cruelty-free products, ASMR, nature.
What I want: to go to Glastonbury festival next year, a Smeg fridge, more bags, a family holiday, a visit to the Lake District, a Weird Fish hoody, to find good music, to have a night out.
That last one, I’d love to put make-up on, put a new dress on, volumise the old hair and hit the town. Maybe Pizza Express and many drinks around town. Ahh to feel young again… Life feels so restricted right now and I swear people don’t realise how lucky they are. If I’m honest I get jealous of people’s freedom.