Novels, homes and life-thoughts

I’m in one of my unprovoked good moods, despite being disappointed by an email from my lecturer, with the essay that has received only a 2:1. Nothing particularly good is happening today, actually i’m lazing around reading The Girl on the Train, I decided to call it a day on Bag of Bones, it just wasn’t the time for that novel apparently. I was reading BoB at a snails pace, it just wasn’t exciting me. I don’t like giving up on things, even novels, I feel like I’ve failed. That being said (and with a little encouragment) I decided if I’m not enjoying it, just stop. It can still sit on my book shelf, neglected until I take pity on it. Novels are of some importance to me, I actually have a bit of a “problem”. I buy too many, I have enough to get me through the year. Why? I find them so, so appealing. I love crime/thriller/mysteries. I love the kind of story that has you asking questions all the way through until BAM, some crazy, mind-blowing shit happens at the end and my world has been turned upside-down momentarily until I’m back to relentlessly normal reality. I’m nearing the end of The Girl on the Train so I might write about it soon, for the sake of anyone who stumbles accross my blog and for whatever reason actually decides to read my mindless crap, there will be spoilers. For now; the book is absolutely gripping.

Today is my last day off uni and I’m lazing around, as I said. I’m waiting for a microwave to be delivered. Knowing my luck, they’ll choose to drop by when I’m in the shower singing along to Bon Jovi or AC/DC. Mike and I are starting to buy some kitchen essentials for when we move. I bought a kettle, he bought a microwave. I can’t wait for us to have our own house. As much as I’ve appreciated being here I will be so much happier in my own place. We have a ‘wish list’ on Amazon of some kitchen items we’ll be buying soon. The reason we’ve stuck around for so long (well since the end of October, for me) is because we have been saving money, or Mike has and I’ve been saving a little in the Terramundi pot that I got him for Christmas. Hopefully, we’ll have a new home sorted by June, but I think we’ll be moved in before then. I get excited when I think of how happy we’ll be in our pretty, little home. I’m going to call regarding a house after I’m done writing, unfortunately there is already 15 viewings on this place…

It’s tough being a student and therefore unable to help financially but it’s important to me that I continue with this. I know we’ll struggle for a few years or more but after that I might be able to start on a rewarding career. I sometimes wish I had already been to uni, if I worked hard enough when I was younger I could have already achieved the degree and I could have started my long journey up the ladder. I don’t like to dwell though. I know I didn’t have the best start in life and at least I’m still trying to create a secure and happy life. I also have the most amazing boyfriend who is endlessly supporting of me. He makes me feel really safe and if it wasn’t for him I don’t know what my life would be like but I’m fairly certain I wouldn’t feel so safe and I wouldn’t be at uni. Maybe I would have gotten depressed and my life would have taken even more of a decline. I could be a waitress with very little hope for my future. I could be a drunk; I guess I’ve never been as happy or carefree as other people. I used to be my own worst enemy. But now I’m so much better and so much happier. I don’t drink or smoke anymore. I go to uni and I spend the rest of my time with the man who is everything to me (soppy, I know).

I’m a big believer in being good to others, hence the career choice. People are seldomly truly kind. People often only look out for themselves. I pride myself in knowing that I care, I’m rational, I look a little closer. I’d love to help the homeless, the outcasts, the neglected and forgotten, who’s lives don’t know mercy or kindness. I think I might do some volunteer work over summer.

For now though, I’m getting back to the dark world that is The Girl on the Train.

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